Do you have to make a decision? Don’t let indecision make you miserable.

https://youtube.com/@tylerbaileytravel?si=_1E4Fotlbkg9ukpR

Petra takes you on her journey of indecision to the point at 4:58am when everything became clear to her on what direction she will take on moving forward with her decision regarding her social media life. In her stories she encourages you to face your indecision as well and with confidence can share that indecision is wicked and can keep you in a life of turmoil and limbo. Sometimes making a decision even if the wrong one can be better then no decision.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Welcome to Stand Up and Redo with Petra Demuse, the podcast where transformation isn't just possible, it's inevitable. If you've ever felt stuck, weighed down by past choices, or like life's chapters have been written in ink, think again. Here we believe every day is a fresh page, and you hold the pen. We're diving deep into real stories, bold insights, and life-shifting strategies to help you stand up, shake off the old, and rewrite your narrative with power and purpose. Ready to rise, let's get started. Hello, and welcome to Stand Up and Redo. Have you ever found yourself needing to make a decision? Have you ever thought, oh, I really want to do this, but I can't? I made a promise, I made a commitment, I need to stick with it, but I don't want to do this anymore. And then you just kind of go through the motions, you keep doing what you're doing, but you realize you're not happy and you're just doing it now to do it. Or you're just going through the motions because you want to stand faithful to your word. And then you're undecided. You haven't made a decision about something really important. Or it could be something really small. Maybe you're trying to pick out a wallpaper in your bedroom and you're like, I don't know if I want to do blue or gray. Or maybe you are trying to think about something pivotal, like telling a person that you want a divorce, or telling your mother something that's been pressing, and you have to talk to her about a pressing thing, but you just can't decide how to present it to her. Or I don't know, it could be anything. It could be finances. Maybe you're trying to figure out if you should sell your house. Is your house worth it? Oh, is it bringing you joy? You know it's a good decision to stay in it financially. But why are you doing that? Is it just because it's a good decision to stay in it financially? Or is it because you're so happy there that you want to stay there? Maybe you're unhappy there, but you're staying there because you know it's the right thing to do. Anyway, I want to talk about indecision. And I'm gonna take you backwards a little bit to me, and I'm gonna tell my story about indecision in this very moment and use it as an example. And this I want this podcast to really be about you. And I I came into this podcast wanting to be helpful to people. That's why I called it Stand Up and Redo. Because it it's not about me standing up and redoing my life. It's more about finding people that need to make a change in their own life or that want to do something better, that maybe they failed at and they don't know how to get out of a situation that they're in. Maybe they're laying flat on their back in like a pit of despair, and they just need to get up, to stand up. Maybe they realize that they need to make a decision. When I was younger, I remember being somewhere and listening to someone talk. It was probably at church or somewhere, or maybe it was at like a conference for work, but the whole topic was on indecision and how making a decision can sometimes be the best decision. And they talked about even making the wrong decision is even better than making no decision. And I have to say, in my whole life, through my whole life, I have had to make some huge decisions. I have had to decide how I was gonna keep my children safe when they weren't safe. And it was a huge decision. And it was one that affected the rest of their lives and the rest of my life. And that's okay. That's okay because I could have made really one of two decisions. And once I made the decision to keep them safe, it was the best feeling, even though it was so hard. It was so hard emotionally, so hard physically, and so hard financially. But it was the best decision. And then I think about other things that are small, like even deciding what color or what curtains you're gonna buy for else. Might sound like such a small decision, but honestly, it can impact your everyday. If you paint your paint your bedroom purple versus white, and you have to walk into that bedroom every day, that was a big decision. I prefer white, but some people might prefer purple. I don't know, it sounds silly, but something as small as that will impact your life. Well, I'll go back to me again, to me, this story, this particular story about indecision for me. And it started at 4 58 this morning. I have been waking up now at 4 58 every single morning. Three mornings in a row. I woke up at 4 58. It was just it's hysterical. I'm laying in bed and I look at my watch because I've been trying to wear my watch so I can time my sleep, and I've only been sleeping like five hours a night. Oh, because even if I go to bed at 11, I still wake up at 4.58. So I need to change that, right? I need to go to bed a little earlier at this point because I can't sleep later, obviously. Even when I have time to sleep later, it's been really hard. I still wake up at early, early and then have to make a decision whether I'm gonna just get up or whether I'm gonna go back to bed and force myself to fall back asleep for an hour or two more. But I'm in the point now where I'm gonna get up and do this live um feed at 7 a.m. So I'm gonna get up now and get myself a little bit more together by 7 a.m. Usually at 7 a.m., I'm like halfway getting ready for work. My hair is wet, I'm like still drinking my coffee and reading my devotions at 7 a.m. But this morning I'm gonna get up and I'm gonna skip my yoga and abs this morning in order to take a shower and blow dry my hair and look semi-attractive by 7 a.m. I shouldn't say attractive, maybe semi put together by 7 a.m. Because I want to do this live feed for um this motivational thing I've been doing for YouTube. Well, it's really for YouTube, even though it's not on YouTube every day. I put it on to Instagram every day at 7 a.m. and 7 p.m. I've been putting a post up to encourage people to live a healthy life and change their standard of living. And when I do that, it's not all about weight, losing weight, or eating differently. It's more about your overall health and creating a standard that sets you into a place in your life that you want to be. Like it's more like about like doing devotions every day or being being um eating healthier for your overall health, like eating higher um nutritional valued foods, and I don't know, I can't really get into it because I like I love health, and that's another thing. I have been putting a lot of topics now on my YouTube video about health, and then I find myself now putting a lot of time into this 30-day health challenge. And I realize that it's put me in a place that I want to make a decision. I mention how I'm the kind of person that when I say I'm gonna do something, I want to do it. I want to do it. Even if I don't want to do it, I want to do it because I said I'm gonna do it. Like, you know how when you overcommit and you say, Yeah, I can do that, yeah, I can do that. And then you realize that you overcommitted and you shouldn't have said you could do all these things that you maybe didn't want to do. And I'm learning from watching some of my why, my why is our girlfriends, I've watched them when someone asks us all to do something big, like maybe something as simple as um a certain bike ride or go somewhere. I've watched some of my friends say, I'm not sure yet, or I can give you an answer later, instead of making a decision right then to commit, because I've found that sometimes I give a com a decision to commit right away, and then I might not really want to do that in a couple weeks or three weeks or four weeks. Like something as silly as spending a weekend doing something that you're not sure of yet, going on a vacation you're not sure of yet, committing to something you're not sure of yet. I remember, and I think this is one thing that I I was thinking about my one girlfriend oh like a year or two ago. I mean it was a long time ago, she asked me if I wanted to go to China, and she's gonna go next I think she's going in September. Excited for her, she's gonna make a trip to China. That's her business. I don't know if she's still going, but she made a decision to go, and she's really excited about her decision, and I think things worked out for her and now it's in the works and everything. Think. I don't know, I haven't talked to her in a while. But I remember immediately thinking I wanted to go. And then I stepped back and thought, Petra, do you want to do that? Because you have all these other things you want to do. This is wasn't your dream to go here. You want to go to I haven't even been to Europe hardly at all. I really want to dive in there if I'm gonna travel overseas. I mean, there's so many places I want to go, even in the US. And I'm not like this woman that has tons of vacation time. Things I and I don't have tons of money, things I have to plan have to be really planned out. And I held back saying yes. I I think I I said yes at first, and then I thought about it. I think I came back and said I wasn't sure. I forget, but either way, I know she's moving forward with that plan. And I've learned that making a decision to do what you need to do for yourself is hard sometimes. And I'm in that place now with stand up and redo. And I'm want to quit. I want to quit and just stop doing in the podcast. It's not that I want to stop completely because I really enjoy it. And I thought about social media in general. You know, you have a conversation with your girlfriends about something really private one night in the car. Maybe you're sitting with a friend, or you're sitting with your daughter, and you're talking about something really private with them. It's very personal. And then the next hour you're going to bed and you see on your reels all these things pop up about that very personal thing that you're still trying to process in your own mind and make a decision about. And then you get extremely influenced by all this garbage that is on the internet. And I want to pull back from that a little bit. So I took myself this morning at 458, and I put these three things on a little shelf. I put my YouTube channel on a little shelf here, and I put my Facebook channel on a shelf here, and I put my Instagram channel on a shelf here. Because they're the three social media platforms that I'm pretty active in. Now I started posting these things on Instagram. And I'm a slave to it because then I went to do a live feed on Instagram and realized I couldn't, so I had to switch my live feed onto Facebook this morning that I'm gonna do at seven. And I've had to like just this whole social media thing is just insane. And then the other thing I did was I started this um podcast originally just like this: me talking in bed, or me talking in a closet, or me like laying down in the dark and just talking like this about a topic. And this is what I love. So I thought about then putting the fourth thing is the podcast. Okay, so here we go. Let's list those again quickly FaceTime, Instagram, YouTube, and the podcast. Oh my goodness, I love the podcast. I love doing this right now. And I haven't attracted a big amount of followers. I think I had 80 followers at first, and then I realized that a lot of them when I started my YouTube channel pivoted over to watch me on YouTube. So that's okay. Um, the podcast platform is on BuzzSprout, and then it goes out to like Spotify and um all those different um podcast platforms. Buzz Sprout, by the way, if you ever do want to start a podcast, BuzzSprout has been just magical for me. I really enjoy put BuzzSprout just to get the podcast out. And I could do a really neat actual YouTube um video on this, just telling you what my journey has been and essentially the things I've used technically for the podcast, the YouTube channel, and that might actually be helpful for some people that want to do this because this has been joyful. These four platforms for me have brought me joy, but now they're not. That's not true, they are, but now I'm at a point of decision. And so let's go back to the shelf. I'll talk about each thing. First, Instagram. I love old school Instagram. I remember when I started found Instagram, I didn't even friend a lot of people that I knew. I didn't follow my friends because I didn't want to see their kids' soccer game, I didn't want to see their child's birthday party. It's really callous and heart heartless of me to say that. But I saw that on Facebook, you know? That was what Facebook was for. Facebook was for connecting with my family in New Jersey. Facebook was for seeing what my cousin that lives over here is doing in her life, or my mom, brothers, or and my family are all doing in their lives wherever they are. It was about that, and it was about connecting for me with people who I love. So Instagram became my escape. It was where I would go look at photos, and it was truly just that. It was like I would follow National Geographic, or I would follow some person that was like hiking through the Adirondack's, or I would then just taking photos, and that's what brought me joy. And then on Instagram, me, myself, I love to take photos that tell a story. I love photojournalism, like where you just take a photo, and it's not a photo of just something pretty. It's a photo that gives you a feeling that you're there, that makes you feel like you're walking into a story. And that's what I loved about Instagram, okay? Instagram's changed. Instagram's become me putting these things up at 7 and 7, putting reels up, watching like trashy reels about hemorrhoid. And how you should never say, How are you? And how if you do Tai Chi walking for 28 days, you're gonna have these amazing abs. Oh my gosh, it's become so overwhelmingly dumb. There you go. It went from being this beautiful journalistic photographic place that I would go where I would just absorb these beautiful photojournalism sites to like I just said, Tai Chi walking. Don't ever say this, don't ever do that. Here's 20, here's 20 reels about how you can apply this face cream or how you can take uh hormone replacement therapy. I don't know. It's just crazy the stuff that's on there now. And it's changed. And here's me putting out my 7 a.m. and 7 p.m. things about health reset. And I am just, I'm just a regular woman living her life, but trying to make you feel like you can relate to a person who's standing up and redoing in a way that is not through Tai Chi walking, you know, getting this special thing done to your face, or I don't know, if you do this particular exercise for 20 days, this will happen. It's not about that for me. It's truly about trying to see how I can help a person feel like they can stand up and redo. And I don't want to put that on the platform of Instagram after this is over. I want to use Instagram for photojournalism again. So I guess what I'm going back to is I took these four things on the shelf and I thought about what I use them for. Facebook again was connecting with my family and friends. Instagram was photojournalism. YouTube used to be how do I fix my bike. I would look something up on YouTube. And then I got obsessed with also camping videos, things that I would watch for 20 minutes at night before bed that would calm me down. Like I loved watching um primal outdoors. Oh my gosh. Now primal outdoors went from being watching him do these beautiful videos of himself, almost like ASMR, like cooking his dinty morse stew over the stove, which I absolutely loved. I think his name's Jason, and now he's with just with this girlfriend, and you get to see her dancing around and hugging him. And of course I'm jealous a little bit. But his platform's changed. I'm hoping he goes back a little bit more still to his photojournalistic stuff that he put up. And Nikki Daventhal, she's really held pretty faithful, I think, to her format. Although she does, she's living in different spots. She has just these cute little 20-minute things that I watch at night, and I love watching her. But that was what YouTube was about. YouTube was about unwinding at night and watching something that I enjoyed that took me out of my head, like someone camp. Um, there's a guy that I love to watch living in his van, and he redoes fans. And I loved that about it. For years, I've watched those weird things. And now YouTube is things like me putting up these quick, flashy things, and just everybody's doing it now. It's all these like women. Yesterday I was trying to look at older women that were successful, and it was literally just this 73-year-old woman standing in the woods talking about her life, and she has 43,000 views.

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And then I looked at my views.

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The most I ever get is like 400. For those little flashy ones, I get at like a thousand. But I'm like, what am I doing? Like, what am I doing? This is like, this is taking my social media platform and changing it to be to to control me, to influence me, to get into a life that I don't want to be in. I don't want to be scrolling through reels on Instagram. Some of them are funny, some of them are fun, but I want to go back to just looking at beautiful photos that people took and absorbing myself and f and then finding myself falling into a place that takes me away from reality. There's um uh one of the girls I went to high school and her husband I went to high school with when I was young, Andrea and John Bailey, they have a son, Tyler Bailey, and he put he has a site on Instagram now that's taking me back to like old school Instagram, where he's really just taking you on his travels and you're getting to see where he goes. That's the kind of thing that I want to fall into on Instagram. That's the kind of stuff I want to watch. On YouTube, I want to go back to watching my camping videos and then also looking for things that help me, like how do I fix my bike? How do I fix the sunroof in my Ford F-150 Raptor, which might be something I'm looking up? So I want to go back to that. And then Facebook, just stick with my family, and then the podcast, I want to do this, just what I'm doing. I want to go on Buzz Sprout, and maybe not every week like I've been doing, but maybe once a month or twice a month, maybe put out a podcast. And YouTube. YouTube is a whole nother story. I, for myself, like I said, I told you what I like to watch on YouTube, but for my own self, I loved doing the long form videos, which are like twice a month. And my goal, if I do stick with the long form videos, would be to sit with another person and maybe interview them about their life, or have another person talk about a topic. Like I got on there with my daughter Julia and Sara, and we talked about a topic. But I want to make a decision now. I made a decision not to quit to go till June. And it's been stressing me out a little bit because it's taking away from the person I want to be a little bit. But I also am the kind of person that can't quit. So at 4 58 this morning, my decision was this, and I'm so excited about it. And it really happened because last night I was supposed to revive I have a podcast ready to put out for Wednesday morning, and I didn't put it out yet. So I have one on peace that I'm gonna I'm converting my YouTube video on finding your piece to a podcast form. And then I'm gonna put this out on podcast. So I have two podcasts coming up. So this week I will get one out. I'll probably get it out tomorrow, which is Thursday. And then I'll get my other one out because I have two. I can edit them really quick. I'll get them out Thursday tomorrow, which is late. I always put it out on Tuesday or Wednesday. So I feel like I failed, right? I feel like I failed yet. But I'm going to get it out on Thursday, which is tomorrow morning. And then next Wednesday I'll have mine come out because I can, you know, you can put the time that they're released. So you can do them on the weekends, which is what I often do. I edit them on the weekends and then they're released on Wednesday. Because that's another thing. I have a full-time job. So this is taking up time. And I realized how the quality of my life has been being taken away because I do this at night and on the weekends. I've actually turned down some bike rides to revise or to do a video. Last night, my two daughters, who never get away from their kids, never get a minute away from their kids, each had a moment to get away for a couple hours. They had a babysitter. And we, the three of us, decided to go see a movie. And I almost pulled back. My truck broke. I didn't have a truck. I was going to drive there. I have to deal with that. That's that's minor in life. I can't even complain about it. How dare I, right? There's people that don't even have homes, and I'm complaining about not having a truck for a couple weeks. Okay, so back to my decision. I almost pulled out of going to see the Devil Wars Prada with my two daughters because I had to edit my um podcast. So I almost pulled out. And then I said, yes, I'll go, knowing that I was gonna have to do my podcast till midnight to everyvise it when I got back from the movies, or I was gonna have to just put it out a day late. Well, as I was driving to the Devil Wears Prada, my daughter Julia picked me up. Her and I had so much fun. We were like belly laughing on the way to the movies. Belly laughing, like full-on hardcore belly laughing. I got to see my two daughters, I got to watch them laugh at different parts of the movie, we got to talk about the movie, we got to talk afterwards in the parking lot. We just got to see each other alone without any distractions. And then I drove home and I went out on my deck and I made a little video that I erased talking on the video about my live feed, which I'm doing at seven, trying to encourage people to watch it. And then I erased it. I thought, what am I doing? What am I doing right now? I'm wasting time. I could be going to bed. And then I thought about it this morning at 4:58, and I made a decision. I made a decision, and I'm so excited about my decision. I'm still gonna put the 7 a.m. and 7P health reset stuff up. It's gonna be smaller, it's gonna be less. It might just be a picture of a yellow pepper that says, This is why it's good to eat yellow peppers. It might be something so stupid, but it's gonna be something that's gonna be motivational because I gave my word. I gave my word to show up for 30 days at 7A and 7B, but it's only gonna take me like two minutes to do it, and I'm excited. I'm gonna do the thing, I'm gonna forward it to Instagram, and I'm gonna do it till May 28th. And then I decided I'm gonna go back to photojournalism on Instagram. I'm gonna stop. I'm gonna do the two things that bring me joy on Instagram, and that is photojournalism. And I actually do these little travel reels too that I absolutely love. They're only like a minute long usually, and I just do them random. So I'm gonna go back to that on Instagram. I am, I'm truly gonna go back to just taking photos and posting them, and then sometimes doing travel wheels. On Facebook, I'm gonna use the platform as a way to connect with my family, to see whose kids play in soccer, to see what my brothers are up to in New Jersey and my mother. I'm gonna really hone in on doing that with Facebook and getting back to that platform. And then as far as the YouTube video goes, I'm gonna be inconsistent with it. I thought about giving it up completely my YouTube channel, but I don't want to because I really do enjoy that long form video. But I'm gonna do it inconsistent and I'm not gonna stress out about it. I might only put one out a month. I'm gonna put more heart into it too. I'm gonna put more heart and soul into putting that one long form video out a month, or maybe two, but I'm not gonna stress about trying to get people to watch it, doing these like quick little shorts and trying to reel people in. I'm not doing that anymore. I'm not doing that. I'm gonna put valuable content up that's maybe just long form. And my daughter Julia is like, mom, it's so boring just to watch people talk. But guess what? I'm gonna do that. I'm gonna sit there. I might have a person with me, I might not, but I'm going back to that. So Facebook family, Instagram photojournalism, YouTube, long form video, and how do I fix the sunroof in my truck if I can't afford to fix it myself? Or I can't afford to, sorry, pay somebody to fix it. And then what did I talk about? Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, Buzzsprout. This is the one that's gonna be the hardest to leave because I love laying here and talking every week. Love it, I love it. But I don't know how valuable it is to anyone because no one puts comments anywhere. And this is where I'm gonna call you out. No one ever, ever says how they feel about the content that I'm putting out. No one even says, well, that's not true. There's maybe like five, five little comments. That's okay. But I don't really have a lot of followers. I have like 40 or 50 people that consistently listen to it, which is awesome. And I'm so excited because I truly hope it's people that I'm helping. I hope it's people that are finding value in the content. But I just would like to ask you if you have a heart for this podcast, just to put a heart or like up, just to say it, just to state it, just to put it up there, just for my own ego, right? Yeah. Because I don't know what I'm gonna do with a podcast yet. I might just pull back from the podcast to. Um, I might just do my long form videos once a month and convert them into audio and put them on the podcast. So whatever I do with YouTube, it's real easy to convert that into a podcast. So I guess for now I might stop with the weekly ones um at the end of May, because I promised I was gonna do the podcast till May, because in May it'll be a year for the podcast, and then in um end of June, the beginning of August will be a year for my YouTube channel. So the end of May, I'm gonna go to probably just converting my monthly YouTube long form video into podcast and to just doing maybe one long form video a month and posting my photos on Instagram. And that's it. That's it. You might see a travel reel here and there, random, but I'm pulling back, and the decision I made at 458 to do that gave me so much peace. And I guess the whole point of something that you can take home from this podcast is about decision. Indecision is the worst feeling ever. Indecision, whether it be about something small or something large, eats at you. It eats at you, it eats at you emotionally, and it gives you um discontent. Indecision, I believe, yields discontent. So what I'm gonna encourage you to do is stand up and make a decision, and sometimes, even if it's the wrong decision, it's better than no decision. And trust me on that one, because I've learned through experience, and I hope that you take this information that I gave to you and you stand up and redo. Thank you. Hi, I'd like to give credit to Sarah Gephardt for the cover page of this podcast. This podcast is a work based on the personal experiences, reflections, and memories of the speaker. The events described are true to the best of the speaker's knowledge and recollection. Some names, locations, identifying characteristics, and timelines have been changed or altered to protect the privacy of the individuals involved. In some cases, composite characters have been created or dialogue has been reconstructed based on memory. The intention of this podcast is not to defame, malign, or harm any individual or entity. Rather, it is to share the speaker's journey with honesty, vulnerability, and integrity. Any opinions expressed are solely those of the speaker and are not intended as statements of fact regarding any person, group, or organization. Listeners should keep in mind that human memory is inherently subjective and selective, and while every effort has been made to ensure accuracy, this podcast reflects the speaker's perspective and truths. Thank you.